There is a high chance this post will make no sense. But its long over due (and thank you, L, for the gentle promptings to write even though I blatantly ignored them).
I moved back to Baltimore and I have no idea what state my relationship is in.
Since being back, I have lived a month that has felt timeless, and not necessarily in the good way. I have learned small things (don’t buy a cordless drill at Target on sale; it will only work on cardboard walls and even then, it will probably tear out a chunk of the wall) and let go of big things (expectations of others). I have reinforced my beliefs on things (refusal to lower your standards and expectations for yourself) and evaluated my feelings on others (just what a relationship should entail). And, guys, I have cried way more than I care to admit.
But I have also laughed uproariously with old friends, played with a gleeful child that reminds me there are pure souls in the world, and felt truly loved by friends, family, and mentors. I am also reading voraciously, thinking as much as possible, and talking to as many individuals as I can.
And finally, after a timeless month, I am ready. “Today is the beginning of the rest of your life.” “When one door closes, another opens.” “You raze the old to raise the new.” and all the other cliches about living your life, making each day count. Insert them all here.
Now is the time.